The Meltdown of Shiranui Genma
by meleth78
Summary: Continuation of The Meltdown of Umino Iruka. What happens to the deeply traumatized Genma? Did he survive? KakashiIruka, GenmaRaido implied
1. The Actual Meltdown of poor poor Genma

Title: The Melt-down of Shiranui Genma by Meleth78

Genre: Humor/Romance

Characters: Genma, Kakashi (Kakashi/Iruka & Genma/Raido implied)

Rating:R

Status: Continuation of The Melt-down of Umino Iruka. I just couldn't leave it at that.

Comments: Poor poor Genma. I didn't mean to hurt you but I HAD to…It's really not my fault. At least I gave you a sweet caring Raido didn't I?

Disclaimer: They want to be mine, but they are not. No one cares how THEY feel.

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Shiranui Genma had just about had it.

Kakashi had been stalking him for days. The pale-skinned fucker hadn't even bothered to hide the fact from the long-haired jounin. He stood, single blue eye blatantly staring while Genma had been supervising the training of some higher level chuunin. He watched, radiating evilness while Genma did his paperwork in the teacher's lounge. The silver-haired bastard even glared, emanating pure hatred at Genma while the latter was trying to have a peaceful lunch with Raido.

Genma had had enough. The sheer stress of anticipating Kakashi's retaliation was driving him insane. Last night, he had suddenly…in the midst of…Genma couldn't even bring himself to think about it. Raido had been really really sweet about it and even comforted the distraught jounin by saying that it wasn't uncommon, and that it happened to the best of men. Plus Raido, being a sweet caring soul, also added that he was fine with just cuddling for the night. CUDDLING! Genma moaned as he held his aching head in his hands. He couldn't do it anymore. Kakashi clearly wasn't going to make his move anytime soon. The copy nin was too damn brilliant to not realize the effect his stalking was having on the other jounin. Genma wouldn't even put it pass the silver-haired fucker to have cast a jutsu that led to his….dysfunction last night. Yes, that must have been it. A forbidden justu cast by a vengeful Hatake Kakashi. No way it could have been anything else. That HAD to be it. Genma was just going to have to confront Kakashi and inform him politely to quit it. After all, it wasn't Genma that had done the licking…

'_Do you taste like vanilla?'_

God. The senbon-chewing jounin clutched at his arm which had been so suddenly and so wetly violated. He could still feel the damp swipe…Genma bent over groaning, head still in his hands. Don't think about it. Don't think about it. At least Iruka hadn't been able to reach him to sniff….arrghh…don't THINK about it!

Sigh, it wasn't as if Genma didn't find the young sensei appealing. On the contrary, he found Iruka very, very enticing. For one thing, the younger man was just so darn pert. He had a scarred pert little nose, cute pert little lips and an ass that screamed out 'Look at me! Squeeze me! I'm so fricking pert you wouldn't believe it!'. The pertly pony-tailed sensei even taught at the academy all pert like, his pert bits bouncing about merrily in the classroom. The senbon-sucking jounin sighed again, senbon in question twitching irritably. Like he thought earlier, it wasn't that Iruka wasn't attractive. It was just… Genma shuddered as he recalled the look in Iruka's eyes as the younger man had asked that question. Insanity, hope and longing combined to form a crazed gleam that made the chuunin's dark eyes scarily glazed. Sigh. He no longer wondered why the apparently respectable chuunin had taken up with the mask wearing deviant. They were both fricking nut cases. Unfortunately for him, one half of the fricking nut-cased duo had developed a vendetta against him. Crap.

Ok, thought Genma as he took a calming breath as he re-arranged his hitai-ate bandana at a more rakish tilt. This had to end and this had to end now. There would be NO MORE JUST CUDDLING. He was going to look for Kakashi right this very moment. Unfortunately for him, Genma knew exactly where there the Sharingan jounin was because Kakashi had announced loudly that he was stepping out for a couple of hours to train with his team but that he would be BACK. The last comment was clearly aimed at the long-haired-senbon-chewing jounin who froze, stupefied, as the paler man all but shrieked it into his left ear.

Pre-emptive action, the mark of any competent shinobi. And Genma was nothing if not competent.

Ooooo

Wandering around the open field, Genma first spotted Naruto and Sakura practicing jutsus together, the young blonde actually appeared to know what he was doing. Sakura was even laughing happily at his progress. And then Genma saw him. Kakashi. The masked jounin was sprawled out, back to the trunk of a tree, for all appearances engrossed in his book. But Genma knew better. He felt it the minute he stepped into the vicinity. The chakra of the silver-haired man had fixated on him and was right at that very moment focused on squeezing THE VERY ESSENCE out Genma's own source of chakra. Genma gasped sharply, bit down hard on his senbon and then bellowed,

'YOU BASTARD!' before he doubled over. Knees hitting the grass. 'KAKASHI!' Genma looked up as he yelled out the other jounin's name threateningly. 'You fuck…' the long-haired man wheezed, senbon clenched hard between his teeth.

Naruto and Sakura froze. Wide eyed they stared at the usually unflappable dark-haired jounin who was now a pale, panting, heavily sweating curled up ball. They also noticed that the older man had a frantic, painfully tortured look in his light brown eyes.

'Naruto. Sakura.' The melodic voice of Kakashi called out to his two partners.

'Sensei?' questioned Sakura on behalf of both of them. Naruto was otherwise occupied, slowly inching his way to the dark-haired jounin clearly intending to prod the man out of his stupor.

'Why don't you and Naruto take a break? Genma-san seems to have something he needs to talk to me about.' Kakashi beamed as he ruffled the pink haired girl's head.'

'Hai sensei' Sakura replied before grabbing on the protesting blond boy. She made to leave but not before throwing a disapproving look at the long-haired jounin for what she saw as reprehensible behavior. She was so glad that Kakashi-sensei was her teacher. He might be late all the time and kind of perverted but as least he wasn't demented. Sakura hoped that her sensei would be able to help his fellow jounin or at least offer wise counsel to him in his time of desperate need.

As the two teenagers made their way away from the two older men, Kakashi slowly sauntered over to the enraged kneeling special jounin, stuck his hands into his pockets and bent down before casually commenting,

'Chakra got your balls?'

'You bastard!' gasped Genma in return. 'Let…let GO!'

'Why should I?' A harder squeeze.

'He licked me FIRST!' Genma screamed, hands going for his own groin. Why? WHY oh WHY was it that every time someone was angry at him the first thing they went for was his dick? He knew he had a reputation but this was just getting ridiculous!

'I know.' replied Kakashi calmly.

Ok. THAT Genma didn't expect. His wide eyed looked must have conveyed his shock to the other man because Kakashi squatted in front of him and firmly took Genma's chin into his gloved hand.

'Iruka told me.' The evil, pale man smirked. 'What? You think he keeps anything from me? You think he can?' He gently shook Genma's chin. 'Silly silly Genma-san'

A tinge of humanity must have re-entered Kakashi as he looked into Genma's beautiful large brown eyes because he released both his intensely painful chakra hold as well as his grasp of the other jounin's chin. The dark haired jounin sat down heavily.

Genma barely prevented himself from scrambling back and away from the clearly insane man. But he was a jounin. He held his ground. Mostly by sitting on it. Also, he could barely breathe, much less move. He slowly brought himself up onto his knees and watchfully observed the man close to him.

Kakashi had plopped himself down quite comfortably, cross-legged in front of his fellow jounin, chin in hand, peering curiously at the other man, gauging his reaction. He knew it. Kakashi had finally lost it. He must have killed….no….Genma had seen Iruka only this morning at the academy. The younger man certainly didn't look any worst for wear. In fact, Genma had even overheard Anko whisper to Kurenai that Iruka-sensei had an 'I've-spent-all-week-being-stupendously-fucked-and-I-don't-care-who-knows-about-it' lose limb-ness to him.

'Then why?' questioned the long-haired man out loud. His brain however, was shrieking, Why_ me you single-eyed freak? Why not your precious licking chuunin Iruka? Why am I the only one to suffer…dysfunction! And WHY does everyone ALWAYS go for my freaking dick!_

'What? Iruka's not good enough for you?' shot back the silver-haired man. Malicious.

What the fuck?

'What the fuck are you talking about?' Genma threw back. They were….they were insane!

'My Ruka told me what you did to him.' continued the pale jounin.

'I didn't DO ANYTHING TO HIM! He came on to me' Genma almost sobbed. 'He even LICKED me!'

'Oh, and it didn't occur to you to lick him back?' said Kakashi clearly extremely displeased.

'WHAT!'

'Ruka said you ran away. You didn't even let him SNIFF YOU!' Kakashi yelled at the end, his composure cracking at the thought of his precious Ruka having to suffer the humiliation of not even getting a cursory swipe back. The pale jounin continued,

'You didn't have to like it, but you could have pretended.'

'WHAT!'

'You hurt his feelings. I had to spend that whole night convincing him that he was still sweet and adorable and lickable. My tongue went NUMB!' Kakashi paused, 'How could you!

Genma was just….speechless. The other jounin continued his reprimand,

'You hurt him you son of a bitch. You couldn't have blushed? At least ASUMA did.' Kakashi all but flung the other jounin's name in Genma's face.

Asuma? Kakashi was glad that the cigarette smoking man got turned on by Iruka? What the fuck? Genma just stared at the other man, seriously not understanding what was going on.

'Don't you think Iruka is attractive? Does he…' the pale jounin paused before he spat out the next part of the sentence, 'disgust you?'

'What?'

'I-RU-KA. Are you attracted to him?' Snapped Kakashi. 'Pay attention.'

Fine, Kakashi's problem seemed to be that Genma hadn't reacted to Iruka, did the other jounin want him to admit that his lickable-lover was appealing? That wouldn't be a problem. Iruka was after all, as Genma had previously asserted, one of THE hottest shinobis in Konoha.

'He's….very attractive. He's…he's quite hot actually.' Replied the long-haired jounin.

'So you wouldn't think twice about doing him?' questioned the other man. His single cobalt blue eye stared intently at Genma this time, the answer clearly meaning a lot to him.

The senbon-sucking jounin almost slapped himself silly. God. So this is what it was all about. Kakashi protecting his precious love's fragile ego. It was actually very sweet, in a really stupid, making no sense whatsoever sort of way. Genma would do anything, say ANYTHING to get the crazy-ball-squeezing-jounin and his manic-arm-licking-lover off his back. Plus, he wasn't totally lying when he said,

'Sure I'll do him. He's totally fuckable. Anytime.'

Genma reached out to pat his fellow jounin amiably on his shoulder. There there. Feel better now? The dark-haired jounin then mentally congratulated himself for managing to weasel out of this total mess without coming to blows with the infamous Sharingan Kakashi. Not that he couldn't take the younger man but he had to conserve his strength to prove to Raido tonight that he could do more than just cuddle. Suddenly, the squeezing sensation that had previously assailed his groin became a vicious chakra-molded kick. Genma screamed as he doubled over again, grabbing on to his inflamed crotch.

'Wha……..wha…..I said….what you….wanted' He barely managed to gasp out. Why God why? Why ALWAYS the crotch?

'That's for even thinking of getting your grubby hands on my Ruka.' Snarled the pale jounin from above him. 'Stay away from him bitch, or I'll really make your life a living hell.'

With that the silver-haired jounin got up, brushed off his grass covered butt and whistled a jaunty tune as he slowly made his way to where Naruto and Sakura were sure to be.

ooooooooooooo

Raido found Genma later than evening, sprawled out flat on his back where Kakashi had left him. The long-haired jounin was silently sucking on his senbon, staring blankly at the darkening evening sky. Upon seeing the scarred man, Genma whimpered and clung on to his love like a newly born babe as Raido gently brought him back home for yet another night of just cuddling.

ooooooooooooo


	2. EPILOGUE

EPILOGUE

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

On the other side of town, Iruka sat at home, impatiently waiting for Kakashi to return. From what the other senseis had told him, Genma had gone in search for the silver-haired jounin. They also mentioned that both men had been acting weirdly for days now. The usually flirtatious Genma had been skulking around, snapping at anyone that approached him. And Kakashi? The Hokage herself had to have a talk with him about misusing his Sharingan in the teacher's lounge. Iruka was anxious to know the outcome.

As he waited, Iruka thought about that night, just a few days ago after his fateful encounter with Genma…

_Flashback…._

The two shinobi were lying, sticky and stated on the bed, bodies slowly starting to cool, heartbeats beginning to return to normal. Make-up sex was definitely the best of all the categories of sex that existed. Iruka shifted slightly so that he was curled up against the older man, throwing his leg over Kakashi's, rubbing up against the taller man. He then teasingly nuzzled at the fair skin just beneath Kakashi's jaw leading to his neck. Mmmm….Iruka stuck out his tongue and took a long, slow swipe. Definitely vanilla. Rich, smooth and creaaamy vanilla. He licked again and then continued lapping wetly because, if truth be known, he was headily addicted to the way the jounin tasted.

'Ruka?' murmured the sleepy copy nin quite enjoying the feast his young love was making of his skin. 'Are we going again? Did I leave out more bits?'

Despite the hopeful tone to his voice, Kakashi was starting to lose feeling in his tongue. This was mostly because Iruka had insisted on three separate occasions that the jounin had left bits un-licked and the older man had to re-start his lick-fest from the very beginning. Starting from the toes of course. Kakashi didn't really mind because for some reason, his Ruka had suddenly developed an insecurity about how lick-worthy he was and the older man couldn't allow that could he? Although, Kakashi had noticed that the younger man's insecurity had centered quite distinctly on certain… bits. In fact, he had made his jounin lover lick a certain smooth phallic shaped bit over and over and over….

'Maybe….' Iruka whispered happily in reply, 'You might have to check again in a few minutes.' The young sensei seemed to enjoy trailing his fingers on the wetness that had splattered on Kakashi's pale, leanly muscled stomach. Using just the tip of his index finger, he started to draw long wobbly lines and crooked little hearts with the silkily warm fluid. Kakashi' tummy wriggled a little as he clamped down on Iruka's wandering hand.

'Tickles' murmured the still sleepy copy nin.

'You're sticky' retorted Iruka. 'Me also.'

'Hmmm…..don't care. I like you sticky.' A single blue eye opened and leered at the blushing sensei. 'You should be sticky all the time'. Iruka giggled and ducked his tousled head back into the crook of Kakashi's neck, smiling against the warm skin. He took a deep breath. The man even smelled like vanilla. Rich, smooth and creaaamy vanilla essence.

Sniff…Lick…Sniff…Lick….Lick…Sniff….Giggle.

There was quiet for a while, as the two men drowsed. Then Iruka spoke again, murmuring into his lover's pale neck.

'Kakashi?'

'Hmmm?'

'I'm glad you're not angry.'

'At you? Not anymore. As long as you don't go around randomly licking other jounin.'

'Not at me. At Genma.'

'What? Genma? Why would I be mad at Genma?'

Kakashi thought he should probably have a word or two with the other jounin about Iruka's little prank. It was no wonder the other man had muttered about nut cases when Kakashi passed him in the hallway. Genma must have shown considerable restraint. God knows that an upset Iruka was an irrational Iruka and even someone at jounin level would have problems handling the emotional chuunin.

'It was because of him that I….that I…'

Huh? What was Iruka talking about?

'That you what?' asked Kakashi.

'That I didn't feel…lickable…' murmured the chuunin sensei, his voice almost an inaudible whisper.

'What? Why? He was probably just shocked that you…'

'He yelled and…and he ran away! And he gave me this funny look…' Iruka seemed to have to take a deep steadying breath.

Kakashi knew that the young sensei wasn't the brightest bulb when it came to his own allure. Genma probably ran away to….relieve himself, so to speak. And Kakashi was pretty sure that Genma's 'funny' look was one of unadulterated animal lust. Iruka had LICKED him for god's sake. Any red-blooded male would have surely experience a spontaneous groin related swelling. And Genma, from the grapevine in the teacher's lounge, was most definitely a red-blooded man. But just as Kakashi was about to explain the facts of life to his sweet innocent love, Iruka murmured sadly,

'He looked…disgusted.' The younger man whispered the last word out as if saying it any louder would lend it greater credence. 'And he…he didn't even turn red like Asuma did.' The chuunin turned his head away from Kakashi in apparent shame.

Kakashi paused for a moment to digest the information he was receiving from the younger man. Iruka continued,

'I already told you he ran away. But I was…I was too ashamed to tell you that it was because he was….grossed out.' The young sensei paused a moment before adding, 'I didn't want you to get ANGRY' A look, 'at GENMA.' Another look.

Kakashi was still doubtful,

'Are you sure he looked dis…'

'Yes'. Mournfully sad. 'I know what disgust looks like. The villagers used to look at Naruto like that all the time.' A sniff. 'But don't be mad at him ok? I'm probably not very…'

'You are very! You're VERY VERY! Don't let that senbon-sucking rat bastard tell you otherwise.'

Kakashi was fuming. Like the way Naruto got stared at? Even now, after all the boy had achieved, Kakashi still caught some of the villages giving looks to the energetic teen. If that was the look the senbon-chewing jounin gave his Ruka….Well, if Genma thought that he would get away with insulting his beloved Ruka he had something else coming.

'Describe everything that Genma did. Don't miss anything out.' Commanded the now irate jounin.

It was very late by the time Iruka finished with his story and after Kakashi had clarified several points, the young sensei had apparently fallen into an exhausted sleep, Kakashi however, remained wide-awake. He held on protectively to his younger love and swore that Shiranui Genma was going to experience the wrath of Sharingan Kakashi as it had never been unleashed before. As the absorbed silver-haired jounin plotted and planned, he missed the peek that the supposedly slumbering Iruka snuck at him. In fact, the pale man was so engrossed with his internal ministrations, it was no wonder he missed both the soft snicker that emerged and the self-satisfied smirk that crossed the chuunin's face as Iruka finally fell into a contented sleep.

ooooooooooooo

Back in the present, Iruka grinned impishly to himself, his pert bits almost vibrating in anticipation. He couldn't wait for Kakashi to get back and tell him what had happened. Life was definitely good.

THE END.


End file.
